Gifts for Grandchildren

Cover via Amazon

Gifts for Grandchildren

It’s the official kickoff of the gift giving season with the classic questions:

What do the children want (that I would like to get them)?  

How much will this cost and/or am I willing to spend?!

(Some people reverse these questions!)

I have had my best success in a number of ways:

1)      Go to a great store or department that provides service in one of the major gift areas (toys, clothes, electronics, books and magazines). Then just ask an associate what’s “hot” for offspring in your age, gender, interest, and budget categories -- by now they have seen the patterns and can advise you.

2)      The internet offers an endless supply of options. For a fee and sometimes for free, there’s no worry about wrapping, packing, and shipping:  

For girls, try: http://www.thecompanystore.com/ or http://www.manictrout.com/.

For guys, try http://www.thinkgeek.com/index.shtml or http://rumbatime.com/

Some great sites for young children are http://rompstore.com/ or  http://www.gummylump.com/, or http://thebabygardner.com/ .

3)      Bring the child a small token gift or candy, and then take them shopping for their gift. It’s a great chance to spend time together and learn more about them and their interests, and by then there should be after-holiday sales!

4)      Give them an experience (ideally with you!). It might be theater or sports tickets, special lessons, summer camp, a manicure.

5)      Money, not a gift card which can be misplaced and/or forgotten (unless of course, it’s at http://www.goodcopy.com/ for your favorite young entrepreneur!).

6)      Actually it might seem silly at first, but getting your young babysitter, dog walker, yard raker their own business cards does make for a very cool personalized present.

Finally, if you discover a hit, don’t be afraid to stick with it! A number of years ago, I revisited my own beginning classic reader, “Storybook Treasury of Dick and Jane and Friends,” and gave it as a gift to all the young children I knew. The kids adored it! (However, they read it over and over and over, and their parents hated it!!!!  I thought it a small price to pay for a love of literature.)

Happy gift giving!

Social Bullying to a New Level?

Image via Wikipedia

Social Bullying to a New Level

Are there more nasty, little girls or are we just noticing it more?   Do “helicopter” parents hover and take every small slight to heart? I don’t think so. Look at how devastating it is: 

In the case of a little girl named Caroline Port, the torment didn’t begin until first grade. Within months of starting at a private elementary school in suburban St. Louis, Caroline, now 9, was waking up with night terrors, sleepwalking and crying excessively. When her mother, Karen Port, met with Caroline’s teacher, she learned that her daughter was being ostracized. (Italics added.)

Five birthday parties passed, without any invitations. No one would play with Caroline. She sat with the boys at lunchtime. “I hate myself,” she would tell her mother when she came home. She was 7 years old. -- “The Playground Gets Even Tougher” by Pamela Paul

After I read this, I mentioned it to a GoodCopy staffer, and we agreed we were so lucky to have missed the ordeals of social torment and ostracism.  So, how did we get “here?”  

Parents may be partially to blame, more worried about their children’s social status than their character:

A kindergarten teacher at one of New York City’s top private all-girls schools observed, “The mean girls are often from mean moms.” She was thrown back by the “venom” among 5-year-olds. They’ll say, “You only read ‘Biscuit,’ and we’re all reading chapter books.” Or, “Why don’t you brush your hair? You don’t look nice today.” And they’re not afraid of getting into trouble with a teacher. “Perhaps they can act that way at home without repercussions,” she said. “It’s untypical of this age group because they’re usually adult-pleasers.” 
 

Some years ago I had to explain to my daughter that, in the wake of a highly publicized presidential dalliance, she couldn’t wear a Monica Lewinsky style beret to school.  The news is even more explicit now, and too many other programs are racy, mean-spirited, and violent.  

We all see children (and maybe some adults!) hunched over video games with zombie-like addiction. Aggression wins! What a learning experience.

Youngsters are all over the internet getting even more of an “education,” and following it with “social media” torment on web sites like YouTube, Facebook, etc. Many children text on their cell phones, sending silent, devastating messages about their classmates.          

Even the Federal government is becoming involved and may consider bullying a violation of civil rights. (That’s another topic, not necessarily for this blog!)

More next time on how parents and grandparents might deal with this.  Tell me about your family’s experiences, too.

 

Related articles

• Cultural Studies: The Playground Gets Even Tougher (nytimes.com)
• Mean girls: The playground gets even tougher (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
• Teens and Social Media Bullying - Why Find Help App is So Important (dannybrown.me)

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